Oh... You'd like a cookbook that makes you laugh out loud, provides great vegan recipes at the same time, and you can't wait until GET-REAL VEGAN DESSERTS: VEGAN RECIPES FOR THE REST OF US (by bestselling author William Maltese and your own Sexy Vegan Mama) comes out this summer?
Well, then, Brian L. Patton, a.k.a. The Sexy Vegan, has you covered! I present to you (and steer you toward), THE SEXY VEGAN COOKBOOK: EXTRAORDINARY FOOD FROM AN ORDINARY DUDE.
I have to admit, Brian is a bit more advanced in his vegan cookery than I. Dude makes his own seitan, y'all. (And, so will I, after I try and master the recipe for Basic Seitan, page 24).
But, here's the thing--Brian's writing makes me WANT to learn to do all that fancy cooking, because he makes me laugh. Mr. Wright clucked his tongue and shook his head at some of the references, like the meat substitute chapter, titled "Beatin' the Meat," and a condiment called "The Crazy Shit," but I rather enjoyed the consistent--if off-color--humor.
I mean, how can you argue with a chapter called "The Most Important Meal of the Day... Cocktails!"? Seriously, a man after my own heart.
The cookbook was sent to me by Brian's publicist, who thought The Sexy Vegan + Sexy Vegan Mama = Vegan Sexyfest, and she invited me to share a recipe on this blog. It was tough, deciding which to feature, but I settled on the awesome Jalapeno Poppers on page 184.
Jalapeno Poppers from THE SEXY VEGAN COOKBOOK: EXTRAORDINARY FOOD FROM AN ORDINARY DUDE
Makes 20 poppers
1 cup whole raw walnuts
2 tablespoons nutritional yeast
1/4 teaspoon garlic powder
1/4 teaspoon onion powder
1/4 teaspoon turmeric
1/2 teaspoon paprika
Pinch of ground chipotle
1/4 teaspoon mustard powder
1/4 teaspoon salt, plus more as needed
2 tablespoons extra-virgin olive oil
1/2 teaspoon yellow miso
4 tablespoons water
1/3 cup canned mild green chiles (either whole or diced)
10 jalapeno peppers, halved lengthwise and seeded (see Tip, next page*)
3/4 cup unbleached all-purpose flour
3/4 cup unsweetened nondairy milk
2 cups bread crumbs
Oil or cooking spray, for spritzing
Preheat oven to 400 degrees F. In a food processor or blender, grind the walnuts, nutritional yeast, garlic powder, onion powder, turmeric, paprika, chipotle, mustard and salt into a fine meal. Then add 1 tablespoon of the olive oil, the miso, water, and green chilis, and puree unil combined. Season with salt and pepper to taste. Stuff each jalapeno half with the walnut filling, until the stuffing comes to the top edges of the pepper.
Time to set up your breading station. You'll need two plates and a bowl. Put 1/4 cup of the flour on one plate, season with salt and pepper, and mix. Place your bowl next to that, add 1/2 cup of flour, and whisk in the milk until you have a smooth batter that's bit thinner than that of pancakes. Season that with salt and pepper as well. On the remaining plate, season the bread crumbs with salt and pepper. Coat a baking sheet or casserole dish with the remaining 1 tablespoon of olive oil, and have it standing by for your breaded poppers.
Lightly coat each stuffed pepper with flour, then dip it into the wet batter, and then coat with the bread crumbs. The filling is thick enough that it won't fall out; just be gentle during the coating process to ensure it stays put. Place the stuffed and breaded peppers on your cooking vessel, give them a light spritz of oil or cooking spray, and bake until golden brown, 30 to 35 minutes. Let cool for 5 minutes unless you love blisters on the roof of your mouth.
*This being a blog, we don't really have a "next page," but this is what Brian's tip says:
Be sure to wash your hands thoroughly after handling any hot peppers, or else you'll be in a world of hurt the next time you touch your eyes, or your wang, or your vajayjay. I always keep a box of latex gloves on hand for hot-pepper handling.
I'm allergic to walnuts, so I used pecans.
I didn't have any ground chipotle, so I used ground arbol chilis.
I'm not keen on salt, in general, so I omitted the additional salt when seasoning my breading materials.
All I had was vanilla soy milk, so that's what I used.
I used to have an awesome "pump and spray" thingy for my olive oil, but I have no idea where it went. I also didn't have any cooking spray, so my poppers went into the oven, naked.
I made up a batch of Brian's Cashew Ricotta from page 213, and filled half of my peppers with that, instead of the filling from this recipe.
Where the recipe says, "The filling is thick enough that it won't fall out..." I thought maybe Brian was smoking some of The Crazy Shit (page 194), but it actually did all stay inside the peppers.
All that being said... These poppers rocked! Mr. Wright actually preferred the Cashew Ricotta-filled peppers, and I had quite a bit of both the walnut (pecan) filling and the ricotta left over, which I'm combining, and stuffing into manicotti shells for tomorrow's dinner, along with some shredded carrot and chopped kale.
Bottom line... Get yo'self to your local bookstore or to The Sexy Vegan website, and pick up THE SEXY VEGAN COOKBOOK: EXTRAORDINARY FOOD FROM AN ORDINARY DUDE. You'll be glad you did!